Conflicting Feelings

Last Saturday I traveled west to hang with my little sister. We were long overdue to spend some sister time together. I really love spending time with her. She's just a cool, fun person. I want the absolute best life has to offer for her- I mean, I'm her sister, that's what all sisters want for their sisters.

How many times can I say sister?

While back in the college city of Lubbock, Texas where I spent 3 years I kept having these conflicting feelings of either young or old.

For example:

Upon my arrival in the Hub City, we went to Spoonfuls, a trendy yogurt place, like all the other trendy yogurt places all over Dallas. Some genius put this one right across from the campus. It was packed with college kids. A lot of my sister's sorority sisters were there. One of them asked my sister if I was a freshmen. A FRESHMEN. Seriously. Should I have re-thought my outfit? I definitely was NOT wearing jeggings, a button down from J. Crew and tall tan boots in 2001, the year I was a college freshmen, I can promise you that. But that naive/blind girl's phrase made me feel very YOUNG. And that was kind of fun.

Then, we go to Chrome, where my sister works. Chrome is a the mecca in Lubbock for trendy and high end fashion. There's a couple other cute boutiques there, but its really fun and I feel like it stands out among the rest. There was a time when I physically couldn't leave Chrome without a new shirt and though I saw some cute items, I was okay that I couldnt buy anything. That made me feel OLD. I'm not impulsive and careless about wasting money? Way too sensible and mature...who am I?

I felt OLD again when I could order drinks at dinner and little sister couldn't.

But felt YOUNG when I was sneaking her some of those said drinks.

And OLD again when I made her let me drive due to the drinks consumed at dinner.

Then YOUNG again when I walked into the wine bar that I worked at in college and it looked and felt the exact same.

Back to OLD when I was more excited about having the coconut cake than the wine.

Then YOUNG coming back to my sisters apartment and giggling as we got ready for bed.

OLD one more time as we crawled into bed so tired and realized it was just 12:30.

The conflicted feelings ended there. We arose, had the best fried cheese in all the land and I voyaged back to Dallas.

On the way home, I started to wish more than anything that my little sister would just enjoy and relish being the age of 19. That she wouldn't try to grow up too soon or rush any part of life because the part that she's in is so great. And ya know, I think I'll take my own advice, and enjoy my young/old age of 27. Mostly because I'm the youngest of all my friends and they're turning 28...hehehe sorry, girls. But really enjoy it all. A common theme I bring up, but its a good reminder when your missing the past or waiting for the future...just enjoy it all.

Dedicated to little sister, without her, I wouldn't be me.