Wednesday, June 10, 2009

the table

How fascinating is it that each of us are made so completely different? I recognize this when I think about the spectrum of my friends. How they range from the most out going and boisterous to the very laid back and calm. When I think of all the intricate differences of people's personalities and spirits I can't help but think, how's there's no way there's not a God. How else could all of the amazing individuals I know exist and be who there are? This brings me back to my friends and how crazy I am about them. I could go on all day about each one, but I think their common thread is this-they all bring something to the table.

I've been hearing this phrase more and more lately. "They don't bring a lot to the table." or "He really brings a lot to the table." You know what it means, but I'll attempt to define: it's when you're out, you a bar or at dinner with a group and everyone around you is in little conversations and somehow you get engaged in a conversation with someone that you haven't really talked to or gotten to know and all of the sudden you're nodding, your talking back at their comments, laughter might occur and a sense of satisfaction always follows. This person is interesting, sincere and educated on some topic that you're not and you walk away from that conversation thinking, "wow, he/she really brought a lot to the table".

I love when I'm surprised with someone bringing something on the table because the opposite of these "table" conversations is usually quite painful and causes me to use my fake laugh; which Mary says, distinctly sounds like this....huh huh huh--how ugly. I should take all steps to prevent my fake laugh ever being used outside the work place (where it is absolutely necessary to function)...

Of course, like every other thought I have, I come upon a moment of self-reflection and ask, "Do I bring something to the table?" I pray that I do and not the antithesis, but I can't really have a conversation with myself, so I guess I might truly never know. I know that with this thought in mind I will aim to bring something to conversations I'm involved in, whether with a stranger or my mom, I hope to "bring something to the table"- not by dazzling them with my interpersonal skills or with an witty joke or funny story, but just by listening, by being present and sincere- which I feel are the main factors when "bringing something to the table" and things that everyone is capable of attempting. You don't have to be the most interesting person in the world to "bring something to the table" all you have to be is yourself and just listen. Of course, I'm preaching to the choir here, because you, my friends all "bring something to the table"..... thank God or we wouldn't be friends because I'd have to use my unattractive fake laugh all the time.

"Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after." - Anne Morrow Lindberg


Robert said...

i think not taking something off the table is more important than bringing something to it

Ande said...

you bring lots to the table.

MeriB said...

Alexis, I always look fwd to "sitting across the table" from you to chat about life!!